My emotions have been fighting their monthly battle for control over my brain. I just counted, and realized, with some relief, that this is state of mind, or rather heart, is perfectly normal.

Sigh. I wish it wasn't though.

Mood 1: Depressed.
This coming week, I'll be at NTU from 0830hrs to 1730hrs for H3 Bio. Makes me wish I hadn't taken it, but yet, without it, and without doing well in it, I won't be able to apply for any scholarship. A necessary evil, I suppose.

Mood 2: Slightly perky
Watched a bit of Shrek 3 that mom is watching as she irons. It isn't as good as the first two Shreks, but it's still got some funny bits. Realized how lucky I am to live in an age of info tech where I can talk to dear Elainey who is miles and miles away with no added cost. Read a bit of ancient news about Mika-sama and laughed. Read more recent news about said person and felt sad again.

Mood 3: Depressed.
I've come full cycle. Stay tuned for the next cycle.

Here's a short quote from Mika-sama which sums up my feelings on leadership exactly:

"When you lead, you have to like put a double... er, er uhh concentration because you know... you just have to."

(Quote taken from hakkinen.com, Spain 1998 post race interview.)

You just have to. Oh the curse of leadership.

The er-ing and uhh-ing reminds me of someone. Hahaha... Don't worry, I think even your English is better than Hakkinen's. But it does remind me of the way you struggle for the right word sometimes. You're always so self-conscious about your grammar. But keep going, you'll improve with time. Kitto! (Especially if you take more time to talk to me ;) )

As for the more recent news, Mika-sama may be divorcing his wife. Aww. I know it's got nothing to do with me, but it gets you down when the person you sort of admire does something you don't think is right. I mean, the oldest of his children is not even 10 yet. In fact, his marriage is around the 7 year mark where most divorces often occur, according to Singapore statistics anyway. I hope it isn't true anyway. Marriages need to be worked out after all.

I'm reminded of a saying I saw somewhere that "true love has no happy ending, because true love never ends."

It's quite interesting the way this saying puts two cliche sayings together and proves that one is real while the other is just an ideal.

I wonder what true love really feels like. Does it happen when you can't stop thinking of someone? Is it when you only want to make them happy and see them smile back at you? Or...?

Koi ni aimai na kotae wa iranai.

My sinus is acting up again. Maybe it'll get so bad I can't go tomorrow...? Wait, I'm not supposed to be happy about that.