Have you ever tried to read too much into what someone does?

I find I do it very often now, with catastrophic results.

Sign in, sign out, busy. All at face value, all at face value. Coincidences do happen.

For some reason I feel rather lonely today. I know I'm not actually, but it persists. Today is one of the days when there's nobody to bug.

It's interesting. I've had a full roller-coaster ride of feelings today. From happy at school, to feeling isolated, to feeling warm and welcome, to feeling like a total stranger when I had to be with them again. I guess I wanted to forget all of them, horrid as it sounds, and I didn't like having to be with them again. Being all strange and weird and out-of-place again. Then I got really hyper just now, listening to Kor pretend to sing like Louis Armstrong. And now I feel all down and tired again.

What is wrong with me?

Have you ever really, truly wanted to change the status quo?

Knowing that you can't. That you mayn't, anyway.

Walking a thousand miles wouldn't be enough for me to see you tonight, because you live further than that from me.

Even as I feel so alone, I know there are friends of mine out there who care about me. Friends who seem lonely and isolated too. But somehow each of us just remains in our own shell, not reaching out, not looking beyond ourselves. Except for the rare occasions.

Ah, somebody has signed in whom I can bug. And she's lonely too ^^

Here's a friend for you, Jane.

So what IS wrong with me?

Maybe it's knowing that you'll never feel the way I do. But haven't I already got used to that? I decided that your happiness and well-being are enough for me.

Maybe it's just PMS after all.

But I just can't shake the feeling that once again, I've done something wrong.