Most of us are feeling the heat already I suppose.

Anyone out there melting from it besides me? The lonely thing about studying at home is that you always feel, well, alone.

I wonder if it's a good thing to do all those other school's prelim papers. Chem has been fine, but I've seemed to have lost my touch for Bio and Econs.

*disheartened.* Like why is it suddenly I don't know what the question wants me to answer? It's not that I don't know the answers. I do. Just that I can't seem to interpret the question right.

I'm seriously worried.

Therefore, in accordance to my new escapist tendencies, I am going to watch an episode of School Rumble before returning to the subject ^^

......


Well, make that two episodes.

......

Hah. Ended up as three episodes :P

Daijyoubu ne? I suppose I'd better be going back to homework. Ehehehheheh...

Kono Namida ga Aru Kara, Tsugi no Ippo to Naru

I've been having a slight School Rumble obsession. Always get some obsession whenever I have something else important I need to see to. Hah.

But the opening song of School Rumble's Nigakki season is really one of the more nicely composed ones that I've heard so far. And the lyrics are nice too.

Usually Japanese songs, especially anime theme songs, are quite emo and abstract and all about love and don't really apply to our daily lives, but this one's a little different.

この涙があるから 
次の一歩となる
はっきり分かるよ 
前に進んでるって
「輝き」の袂（もと）へ 

"Because of the tears I have today, I know tomorrow will come." Kind of true, in a sense that when we struggle we know that we'll become better, so the future we dream of comes ever closer to coming true. One way or another.

前に進むから
自分のペースで

As long as we keep going forward. But I suppose the hardest thing is to go at "jibun no PACE" because everybody around us wants us to go at the speed society dictates we go at. And that's one of the biggest advantages and faults of this education system.

I've come to realize that I really like School Rumble. *And to think when I first heard of it I dismissed it as some shonen manga (manga which sells by making guys happy).* Reading it's a little bit nolstalgic, partly because the group that my closest friends in school and I make up is also a group of four. And there are some similarities... Bunkasai and FunORama, having trouble managing engaging the class during discussions some times, mugging for exams, and Tenma and her Karasuma-kun, except my class doesn't have so many boys, Sawachika and her pride, Mikoto and her feelings...

And when I read the part when Tenma leaves them and the class breaks up as they are reshuffled for their third year... It's exactly where SC4 is now. Except we've still got the exams to go but after that...

I'll miss everybody. I think I already do. Even the irritating ones. Because I'd already gotten used to them as a part of life.

Hontou ni, bokura no sedai wa senchimetaru GENERATION da. Hai. ^^

I suddenly have an inkling why I like Japan so much. It's because, according to the Colour Code, we're both Red and Blue. Idealistic realists.

Flights of fancy and depths of despair. An affliction unique to Red-blues. I suppose that's why I've always like the Tenma-Karasuma pairing.

You could say Tenma picked the most unresponsive, unemotional, monosyllabic-prone, geekish guy in her class. But he does the sweetest things when it matters, has the most unique talents and says the sweetest things when he does bother to talk.

*Unresponsive. Unemotional. Monosyllabic-prone. Why do I sometimes feel a bit like Tenma -.-*

Mikoto and Asou. It's a pity, they would have made a nice couple, but Mikoto was just too caught up with the person from her past. Oh well. Dreams are ever changing. She always seemed to be the confident, assured one when it can to emotions. Turns out she gets it wrong too.

この一歩進むまで, 次の一歩まで, じっくり行くから. One day at a time. One concern at a time.

Jya, atashi no ooji-sama wa ima doko desuka?

The workings of a study-fed mind

We all seem to be falling ill now that the exams are just around the corner. And the weather is not helping.

I am sick, Yokie is sick, Eater is... uncontactable. That kind of makes me worried really, because a mental depression is worse than physical illness at this point of time.

Here's a song for all those tired A lvl muggers:

Take it Shake it, from Kaleidostar.

It's a kid anime, but I particularly like the line "Ganbaru koto ni tsukaretara, ganbaranakereba ii." So people, take a gooooood break when you need it. Because "tadori tsukitai no nara, akiramezu ireba ii."

Nothing much we can do about the weather though. Hopefully it'll lighten up by the time A lvls start?

The rain outside is so fine and the wind so strong that the raindrops are being blown around like the snowflakes I saw in Korea.

Snow huh. I seem to have developed an obsession for it.

For all the hype about it raining lots in Asia, it didn't rain at any of the three F1 venues in Asia. Singapore? Uh-uh. Ferrari's half-***ed system screwed them up. Japan? Nope. Hamilton tripped over his own impatience. China? Negative. And now they're going back to Brazil. What if it rains there...?

Though speaking of China, Kovalainen isn't happy about playing second fiddle to Hamilton and getting the second-class treatment. I can understand why both Hamilton's colleague and ex-colleague would be upset. But that kind of claim is hard to verify, isn't it? I mean maybe he thinks so, but that could be his own skewered vision of the situation. On the other hand maybe it is true, but those involved are only doing it subconsciously and don't recognize their own biasness. It's hard for an outsider to say.

I can almost hear Alonso saying, "Told you so."

I would err on Kovalainen's side though, because the Finnish don't seem like the sort who bitch easily. Like Kimi-sama's "a little bit stupid" description of a blindingly idiotic pit lane accident caused by above-mentioned impatient upstart.

>.>

Another fine example from another Finn: "you dislike Hamilton a bit... perhaps."

-.-"" Even without the "a bit" and hesitant "perhaps" it would still be an understatement.

*oh, said Finn is online atm. now, why isn't he in school? ... class starts at 9.40am? ahh, not fair >.< *

Unless of course, Kovalainen is a different kind of Finn.

Anything's possible.

But I think some are just impossible. Take the dream I had last night. Of. Two of my classmates MARRYING. Yes. OHMYGOSH. What is wrong with me. Just because both their names start with the same first syllable. Just because they're both in my Lit tutorial class. They're completely worlds apart. Nonono, such a fantastical arrangement will never occur. But what if it did? Nic and Nicole... Hmm... Ah, what am I thinking??? They'll kill me if they find out >.>

Gosh. I'd better take something to calm my mind tonight before bed.

In any case, if it really DOES happen, I can point to this post and say "I told you so!"

But I'd rather my own dream come true. Although that would have serious consequences for me and life as I know it...

Hahaha. Mou sukoshi, ne? Just a little bit more, day by day.

Consumer Warning:









)< I just HAD to fall sick on the day of NJC's AEP exhibition. Arrrgh. FROWN. Was looking forward to seeing Shooee's coursework too.

Sulks. Stupid sinus is making me drowsy. Light-headed and unalert. A bit as though my brains have been replaced with cotton.

Second last race of this year's F1 season is taking place in Shanghai now... So fast right. I remember how it all started in Melbourne this year... then it seemed to take SUCH a long time to get to Singapore 28th September... now even the Japan race is over.

Today's race seems less eventful than the previous two. Ganbatte, Kimi-sama.

Hmm. Most cars have made at least 1 pit stop already. It's quite funny really. Everybody takes turns to pit stop, the order gets scrambled up a bit, then by the time the last few cars make a pit stop the order has re-established itself. The order of the first five cars is the same as when the race started. Hamilton, Raikkonen, Massa, Alonso, Kovalainen. Kimi-sama is slowly cutting down Hamilton's lead.

Yawn. It's a little boring, but after what happened in Singapore I think I prefer boring >.> Or maybe it's just my cottony head lagging.

Gehh. Kimi-sama has lost ground to him again.

Yawwwwn. I will not fall asleep. I WILL not fall asleep.

"a poor last lap for Raikkonen as he hits traffic." Traffic? What traffic? Isn't he right in front? Or what? "gesticulating at Fisichella"... oh, he caught up with the guys at the back. Kimi-sama, keep cool. It saves petrol. Even if the gap between you and Hamilton has been extended to 8 secs. Darn.

Ah well. Let's do some Lit in the mean time...

Kimi-sama, get your act together...

Kimi-sama once again catching up...

I think I'll drop Brave New World for now and do Herland- a Plot Summary.

Anddd... the gap just grew again. By 1 whole second. -.-""

Ah well, I suppose if Massa can't catch up it'd be good if enough if Kimi-sama is second.

Problem with doing plot summaries is that I often can't decide what should go in and what shouldn't. Let's do this as a really summarized summary then- just the storyline details and nothing more.

Ooh, I found a plot summary on Wiki! Anything you can do, I can do better. I can do anything better than YOU. Hahhaa.

Kimi-sama seems to be slowing down to let Massa pass him...

From Wiki: "Gilman's intent was to persuade, and therefore Van's job was not to really critically evaluate new ideas, but to accept them wholeheartedly, even to convince the audience that Herland was indeed a Utopia. Through Van's veneer of impartiality, Van functioned as the ideal narrator, supposedly developing insight into the women while retaining his male position."

You sure Van is impartial? Accepting ideas wholeheartedly without prior questioning is not my idea of impartiality. Face it, he's married to a Herland woman.

The gap between Kimi-sama and Hamilton is growing, and while the gap between Massa and Kimi-sama is closing...

Kimi-sama gave way to Massa. As expected but... hai. It's another third placing for Kimi-sama. Guess yokie will be satisfied now. But to my mind, Kimi-sama put up a better show than Massa.

Oh well. The price of duty.

A rather uneventful race alright, comparatively speaking.

Darn, just realized the final race is the night before my first A level paper in GP. Think I'd better not follow the race on 2nd November, j.i.c.

we wish you, a merry christmas

For some reason I'm starting to think of Christmas presents already.

>.> I think it reveals a hidden desire for Christmas to be here already. Because then the longest break of my life would have begun.

I'mmm dreaming of a whiiiite Christmassss... Just like the ones Sami used to have.

Lol. That is such a weird way to change that song. But it's true, he said Christmas wasn't white last year. Great, a theme song for all those living in temperate countries to sing this year because of global warming.

I want to go to Europe... But I suppose Korea is a much more friendly country to foreigners then certain places I'd rather go... like Ja*ahempan. And I've heard Fin*ahemland is that way too. Excuse me. If I'm wrong about the above countries please correct me. After all, Hokkaido was nice even though Tokyo wasn't.

Back to Christmas presents.

I think I kind of know what to get for most people but...

What do you do with someone who isn't too demanding? Makes me wonder whether sometimes its the people like tan tan who whine and demand who're easier to live with. Lol. She feels like my kid sister at those times -.-

Hmm.

^^

YATTA!!! Kimi-sama, omedetou!

Yea. We knew you could do it. It would have been nice if you'd finished first or second, but I guess it couldn't be helped after what happened at the start.

Hmph. But all's well that ends well because of comeuppance for those who drive dirty. Youku kiitei ne. If you act like a road bully you get what's coming to you. PUUH.

Sigh. If only Kimi-sama had finished fourth in Singapore instead of crashing, he'd still be in the running for the championship, if only mathematically-speaking. As it is he's 21 points adrift so it really is gone. Well I suppose it was gone after Singapore, but... but we shall not speak of the sad inevitable, for there is still hope!

Yes. Massa just needs to get his act together.

But my respect for Alonso has just gone up several notches. He is a two-time world champion after all. Now that he's not in one of the best cars around, you really see how good he is. Omedetou, omedetou.

Just as my opinion of another driver has gone right down the drain. Pushing Kimi-sama from second to seventh place. Although he didn't get any points, he successfully made life more difficult for Kimi-sama. Hmph. SO what if you're talented. Doesn't make up for your behaviour.

Ironically this time its ALMOST a reverse of Singapore. It's like McLaren's nightmare now, from Ferrari's nightmare. It quite uncanny how similar the two situations are.

Singapore: Ferarri 2 McLaren 1 on top three grid positions.
Japan: McLaren 2 Ferarri 1 on top three grid positions.

Singapore: Ferrari- one crash, the other no points. McLaren- one third placing
Japan: McLaren- one retired, the other no points. Ferrari- one third placing

I'm not a superstitious person but, coincidence? It's a really rare, really weird coincidence then.

But anyway. Omedetou, Alonso, Kubica, and of course, Kimi-sama.

^^

Quotes from formula1.com
" McLaren didn’t score any points and I think we scored seven points, so it wasn’t too bad overall." Definitely not too bad overall.
"In the end, seventh place is definitely not a disaster given that my closest rival failed to score points." Hah, take that.

Oh, and here's a picture that's rare on at least two counts (also from formula1.com):

interlude

Hai.

Somehow it feels like I've done something wrong again.

I know it's just me, it always is isn't it?

Yet sometimes I wish you'd be more forthcoming about your thoughts.

But maybe you are. Maybe it's really just me again. Somehow I can't help it. What you think just means so much to me.

Ah crap. What the hey.

I need to just shut my brain down for a moment; that particular confused part of my brain. It's so irritating.

I don't feel like doing my work today. FROWN.

I suppose the best thing would be to go to bed.

Haiiiiii~

I've come to recognize a pattern. I'll be ok, then uber happy, then cheerful, then slightly worried, then confused, then downright sad, then something happens and I'm happy again.

I hate this. No, this time the cycle stops.

Why? Because I'm GOING TO BED.

Good night feelings.

And good night friends :)

I promise myself...

1) To be positive and thankful for what I have

2) To not say anything stupid that I'll regret later

3) To work hard for my A levels with the end in mind

4) To pray for you everyday

5) To walk at the speed God walks at.

Mou ichido Starting Up

Ganbatte ne, You-sama (Kimi. Although it IS informal really.)

Lol. At least it sounds better than Alright-san (Heikki. Ok, maybe in romanized Japanese there is one less k.).

Hahaha. And and. The other guy whose name is a female one. (Mika.)

I wonder what the Japanese think.

But the track at Fuji really is quite picturesque, especially from certain angles when Fuji-san is behind the track and stands.

Yesterday was baccalaureate.

It doesn't feel real that I've graduated. (Well after all I just went back this morning for a Chemistry mock that gave me a headache which is still persistent even now, 5 hours later.)

What feels even less real is the fact that I've only got 23 days left before my first paper.

23. Twenty-three. Er shi san. Ni jyu san. Or, as Sami has kindly informed me, Kaksikymmentäkolme. (How on earth do you pronounce that.)

>.< Totally surreal. Like those biennale exhibits at South Beach Development.

Hai. It's too sudden! I've been too busy to actually think about the connotations behind "baccalaureate", especially as its such an unused and *posh* term, as Mr P once implied.

Oh Mr P's classes. One of the lessons I'll miss the most. Difficult to believe that I'll never sit in his class and listen to him monologuing again.

And Bio. And GP. And my other Lit tutorial. And Chem too, of course, despite everything. And Econs. Econs was one of the more unique lessons. Still, I did get an E for Econs in prelims -.- E is for Econs after all, right?

Oh my gosh, if I get an E again...

Hem. Bright side of life, bright side of life.

Oh yes, an UPDATE: I've decided I shall go for Senior's Night after all, since the choir camp has been amended to something else. None of my business in that case.

My feelings about this whole affair... somewhat guilty perhaps? That I haven't been as sociable as I should have? But I'm not a social butterfly after all... I think since I haven't done anything to make enemies with anyone in particular,

I'm so-so. I've had a fruitful time, but if I could change one thing, I would like to change myself and be a more outgoing, engaging class rep. I mean it's one thing to be responsible and efficient, but I only wish I had been able to reach out better to everyone.

Feels like I've not done part of my duty after all, ne?

Hmm. Too late for regrets. Gomendasai yo, minna-san. I guess one way or another I shortchanged all of you.

Eh. Somehow I feel like I'm turning a bit Japanese with all the wanting-to-touch-people's-hearts attitude.

FROWN.

Sigh. Really, sometimes I wish was different.

Eh. On second thought. Not really. Suddenly I can think of quite a few people who are as friendly as I'd like to be, but who get on my nerves once in a while with their inconsiderate ways. FROWN.

Lol. I'm all of two minds today, aren't I? Red and blue.

Must be the headache. So much for Chemistry.

ONGOING OBSERVATION: Following up from my previous post, seems like nothing much has changed between us, so hopefully you really like me for who I am, despite the fact that the male species of human is turned on by sight...?

Time to say goodbye... soon.

Today was Baccalaureate.

But I don't feel like talking about it just yet. So that'll be for another day.

Got to see *someone's class picture. Got to see how *somebody looks like at last.

Hai~~~ feeling a little bit down.

1) I chose a particularly unflattering pic to send him. But it's ok, he doesn't know which one was me. Hopefully, he hasn't guessed correctly either. >.<
2) Ta de ban li you hao duo mei nu >.<

BUT.

3) Ta de ban li ye you hao duo shuai ge. Hmm... there's this one guy with a slight semblance to Kimi-sama... *raises eyebrows*

So weird right?

Lol. Sorry for the hard-to-read pinyin, I can't type Chinese into my computer for some reason.

Was looking at a few youtube vids of S'pore GP, now that I've gotten over my initial disappointment. Almost fell asleep to the sounds of Kimi-sama's monotone -.- It doesn't help that I'm feeling a little sleepy now.

Anyway, Friday pract is on now. Shall go watch live timing...

Ufufu, so much for deciding not to follow this season anymore.

Live timing is not up yet. Hmm.

OH yeah. I never thought I'd see the day when an organization would bug me so many times to apply for their scholarship that I'd actually be IRRITATED.

Yes, irritated.

I don't even know why they want me. Obviously they haven't done their homework. I've failed my 2.4km run for two years running and have near-to-zilch interest in physical activities. I sit on my bum and play violin. At most I will stand for 45 mins playing keyboard during worship, or slightly more than an hour for violin lesson.

And if I have a slight interest in inline skating and ice skating, it is thanks to that particular *somebody and not to the beloved PE syllabus. They never taught me that.

Two emails and two snail mails. I thought if I ignored their emails they'd leave me alone, but apparently not.

Anyway, as my Kor says, a good thing never has to be advertised more than once.

So there.

Pic Spam!

ANIME!

Muahaha. I just finished watching all three seasons of Zero Louise.

Now I may returned to my work feeling motivated and guilty and ready to slog it out :P

I'm so weird.

But just one comment.

Poor Giulio. Appeared in only the last episode of Princess' Rondo for the entire season three. And for a transient 5 seconds? Aww. And though he appeared with much fanfare in Futatsuki no Kishi, he really didn't do much did he? Except serve as Mr Bailout.

Sigh. What can you expect? Written by a male, so all the good looking guys either die, become corrupt, or just plain don't have anything to do.

Casualty count:
1) Wales Tudor, ex-Crown Prince of Albion - DEAD. Was later dug up from his grave, poor soul, to become a bad guy. Then he died. Again.


2) Waldo the Viscount, ex-fiance of Louise - Corrupted, then DEAD.


3) Giulio, Oracle of Romalia - USELESS. Under performer. Like so many guys I know.

4) Bidashal, Elf - MANIPULATED. By The evil one.

*Yes, "What?" is the right question you should be asking regarding the meaning of your existence, Bidashal.*

Not fair. -.-"" The guy getting all the girls is an average *wimp* whose pic I don't even bother to put here.

I suppose that's why some people become mangaka. For revenge. Yes. On all good looking specimens of his species. Even in anime and manga.

Lol ^^

Well, back to this world. *I want a pet dragon too!*

279.

Time is slipping away fast.

I don't know what other guys think but my brother and his friends are of the opinion that NS is a waste of time. While most elders think it's a time for boys to grow up. Cliche, or true?

But it has been found in another mandatory-NS country that men who don't do their NS have more mental and emotional problems than those who do. Coincidence?

Interestingly though, this particular country seems to prefer their recruits already grown up, instead of growing them up, as they do here.

It raises questions when a young man who was rejected by the army to 'grow up' before enlisting later became a psychotic school killer. Avoidable?

279. You've got two hundred and seventy-nine days left to grow up then.

Somehow I think it won't be enough.

279. I've got two hundred and seventy-nine days left.

Somehow I know it won't be enough.

Nobody read the last post I posted right?

*looks around*

Hopefully not. I wasn't in the right frame of mind.

Anyway, I've deleted it.

Hmm. *raises eyebrows* Hey, some Ferrari hotshot just called our Singapore circuit a circus track. What the. I'll admit it feels claustrophobic, but even if what he says is true, he sounds like a sore loser. He makes Ferrari look like a sore loser. But if it's about space, one must really question what he expected. This is Singapore man. We're barely a dot on the world map. We're barely bigger than the fullstop at the end of this sentence on most maps.<= Singapore

But if it really is a circus track, then it only goes to show that drivers who managed to bounce pretty much all the way back to the front are really good. Like Raikkonen-sama ^^

Unfortunately, it includes a certain mclaren driver too -.-